Amber vs. The Shower Faucet

While I was in escrow the rental tenant in my house broke the faucet off in the shower and left me with this:

He said he'd fix it before he moved out, but by "fix", he meant, I'll buy a replacement without reading the part on the package where it says "SINK faucet" and leave it on the vanity for you to install.
Shower Faucet: 1
Amber: 0

After I bought the house, I had about a week and a half before I moved in. On my second day of ownership, I opened the replacement faucet that had been left for me (just one of those fake crystal plastic pull handles that most old sinks and tubs have) and that's when I noticed it was for a sink and not a shower. Grr. But not biggie, after I bought the right one, it would only take a second to screw on. On the 3rd day, I went to Home Depot and tried to get a faucet. Turns out there are different faucet models and those fake crystal pulls aren't universal. I needed to go home and read the make of my faucet on the silver ring.
Shower Faucet: 2
Amber: 0

Two days before I was supposed to move in, I happened to be at Ace Hardware and I decided to just make a random guess and buy a faucet (they're $13) and hope it was the right one because I kept forgetting to check my model. Took it home and it didn't fit. And that's when I noticed it wasn't ever going to fit because the bolt from the old handle had broken off inside the cartridge stem (look closely at the first picture in this blog and you'll see).

So now I had the wrong faucet AND I needed a new cartridge and a new faucet faceplate as well, not just the handle.
Shower Faucet: 3
Amber: 0

Move in day, Sunday June 28, and I still don't have a working faucet. But it was okay because I still had 3 more days of access to my apartment so at least I could shower there. The Moen 1222 replacement cartridge I needed was $40 at Home Depot (although I see it's cheaper at HD online), but I found it for $18 on ebay, so I ordered it. Which meant I had to wait for it to ship and in the meantime, I was done at my apartment so I didn't have shower access anymore. So I suffered one night and the next night took a half-ass shower in my kitchen sink (i.e., washed my hair and shaved my legs - a perfect use for that pull out sprayer attachment!). Sexy.

The part arrived Thursday night and luckily I had Friday off to tackle the shower in earnest. Friday morning I woke up and went to take the faceplate off the faucet, only to discover the screws holding the faceplate in place were stripped and I couldn't get them out with a screwdriver.
Shower Faucet: 4
Amber: 0

Carl, the handyman working on the remodel next door is super nice, so I went over and asked if he had anything that would work on a stripped screw. He gave me a vice grip and some silicon lubricant spray. Didn't work. Luckily my friend and neighbor Matt (of Scooter Brigade post fame) was off work and his friend Max who works on houses is staying with him right now. They came over and Max had a special attachment for his drill and got the screws out in 10 seconds. Turns out the screw wasn't stripped, it was BENT!
Shower Faucet: 5
Amber: 1

The boys left and I got back to work. By following the illustrated instructions that came with the replacement cartridge, I was able to get that out really easy. Although I thought I hit a snafu for a minute when I couldn't pry the old cartridge out with pliers. I had forgotten to put the white plastic turning lever that came with the NEW cartridge on the old one. It's only purpose is to allow you to use a wrench to turn the old one 45 degrees so it disengages. Once I realized I was skipping a step, I was able to get back on track. Got the old cartridge replaced and began installing the new faceplate and faucet.
Shower Faucet: 5
Amber: 2

But the screws that came with the new faucet were too short, so I reused the old, bent ones. Got those in pretty easily, then went to put the new handle on and it wouldn't go on far enough to allow it to screw in to the cartridge stem. Turns out I hadn't pushed the stupid cartridge retaining clip down far enough! So the faucet handle wasn't able to slide back far enough; it was getting stuck on that top bit you see in the picture below.

Not my faucet, I got this from Reader's Digest.

But now I had a problem - I needed Max to come back over and get the stupid bent screws out again because I had reused them to attache the faceplate!
Shower Faucet: 6
Amber: 2

Now at least my shower worked, it's just that it was always on. I had to turn off the main water to the house because the faucet ran non-stop. But at least I could take a luke warm shower. Max was supposed to come over the next day, 4th of July. But he forgot and I didn't want to bug him on a holiday.

So I had to spend the night of the 3rd, all of the 4th, and until about 9pm on Sunday the 5th when Max came over to save me with the main water to the house turned off. I would just turn it on when I needed water to cook or whatever, but when I'd turn the main water on, the bathtub faucet came on full blast too. I was wasting a lot of water which made me feel guilty. But at least I could take showers. I wonder if my neighbors saw me running outside in my bathrobe to quickly turn on the water, run to the bathroom to take a shower, then run back outside to shut the water off again?
Shower Faucet: 7
Amber: 2

So Sunday night Max got the screws back out. Monday during lunch I went to Home Depot and bought new 2 inch screws that were long AND not bent (I keep saying screws; they were actually stainless steel bolts) and had the plumbing department guy show me why I couldn't get the retainer clip down further. Plumbing guy showed me there's actually a slot in the bottom of the pipe the retainer clip has to slide through and I just needed to jiggle everything around to make it work.

That night after I got home from surfing, I tackled the shower. AGAIN. Faceplate off. Faucet parts removed. Time to force the retainer clip through the slot in the bottom. What a bitch that was! I tried adjusting the cartridge a little and jiggling things. Eventually through a tricky combination of pushing down on the top of the clip while using a flathead screwdriver to push the legs back so they aligned over the slot in the bottom of the pipe, I got the clip in. I cheered for myself and my victory over the shower faucet then quickly placed the faceplate back on, tightened the bolts and got the faucet handle on (this time it slid on far enough to actually attach).
Shower Faucet: 7
Amber: 3

Now to test if it works! I went outside (it was about 9:30pm at this point) to turn on the main water and could hear the water running in the bathtub. Ran back to the bathroom and turned the faucet handle to see if I could actually turn the water off. I could!! And I could turn it back on! And I could adjust the temperature! Who knew faucets could be so fun and rewarding? More cheering and major excitement at the prospect of a luxurious shower at a temperature I controlled.
Shower Faucet: 7
Amber: 4

I grabbed my pjs and got ready to take a shower. Once I was in the shower I noticed that I had tightened the faceplate bolts so much that I'd actually pulled the pipes inside the wall closer to the wall which had forced the tub faucet to break it's chaulk seal and it was poking out into the tub. DOAH!!

Shower Faucet: 8
Amber: 4

Whatever. The shower works and I was tired of fighting with it over the past two weeks.

I started this post almost a month ago and I've been intending to fix this last little bit since then, but I'm over it. Maybe before summer's end, I'll loosen the screws so the tub faucet gets back to being flush with the wall and re-chaulk.

Final Score to be posted (but I doubt I can make a 4 point comeback, but technically I'll be the winner since I have a working faucet!).